What a difference a year makes!! It has been four months since my last blog post and so much has happened in that time.
Last Spring Barney was removed from school and placed in an out-patient Psychiatric Hospital due to acute anxiety. While in treatment he was started on a small dose of Zoloft which literally changed his life. Things like loosing data on a video game or discovering a less favored meal on the dinner table which had previously sent him into a tailspin didn't send him over the edge any more. We were full of hope and excited for the Barney to go back to school. Unfortunately the return was not anything like we imagined because the school was not open to our new and improved child. The staff continued to over react: Barney was restrained for throwing a sock or ripping up a worksheet and placed in seclusion for removing his shirt.
Half-way through the second day of his return to school we received an email from the SPED Director informing us that an out of district placement was necessary, the town was unable to meet his need for Therapeutic intervention. This is the kicker, Barney did not require therapeutic interventions in preschool, kindergarten or 1st grade. Extra supervision, yes, intensive intervention, no. His behaviors did not escalate until he was placed in a classroom with a teacher who simply did not care. He had a para and the teacher basically washed her hands of any responsibility for him. Don't let anyone tell you that spectrum kids can't read people. Barney was not on her priority list and he knew it!
Think about how you feel when you get bad vibes from someone. Depending on your personality it can make you jumpy and uncomfortable , dispassionate and aloof , angry and defiant or some combination of these feelings. Now imagine a brilliant but emotionally delayed child who has difficulty with social situations and emotional regulation. He really didn't stand a chance.
The SPED Director gave us a list of schools to look at. As my husband and I began to explore our options we were struck by the fact that we were were being sent to look at programs for emotionally disturbed children. I fully realize that Barney, when acutely anxious, displays some behavior that could be viewed as emotionally disturbed if someone was UNAWARE OF HIS AUTISM. Not one of the schools had a specialty in Autism or even a BCBA on staff, they were all for children with out of control behavior.
There is not a plethora of choice in the area where we live. The local Autism programs are not appropriate for the high-functioning/Aspie kids. What to do? We expanded our search area from a 10 mile radius to 20 miles:nothing! Ack, I couldn't imagine sending my baby so far away. Would he be OK with the longer day? With a long van ride? I was about to commit to the least offensive of the "behavior schools" when we expanded our search to 50 miles and at 45, we found the perfect school!!! Rural campus, small classes, individualized instruction, pragmatic teaching, sensory classrooms, all high-functioning students. The school's motto "...because every child can succeed".
Today is Barney's 5th day at his new school. There has not been a single complaint about being bored. He jumps out of bed each morning at 6:15 in a rush to dress, eat and brush his teeth in order to watch for his bus. When it arrives he flys out the door, he can't wait to get there!
45 miles is too far a distance to travel only if your are headed to the wrong place. My boy has found his people. He feels understood, valued and at peace. We have been blessed!
